Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.
View quote | Quotes about Action

The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.
View quote | Quotes about Adversity

One ad is worth more to a paper than forty editorials.
View quote | Quotes about Advertising

I never met a man I didn't like.
View quote | Quotes about Affection

America is a great country, but you can't live in it for nothing.
View quote | Quotes about America

My ancestors didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they were there to meet the boat.
View quote | Quotes about Ancestry

When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do -- well, that's Memoirs.
View quote | Quotes about Autobiography

We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.
View quote | Quotes about Automobiles

There ain't nothing that breaks up homes, country, and nations like somebody publishing their memoirs.
View quote | Quotes about Biography

Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
View quote | Quotes about Change

There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
View quote | Quotes about Cinema

Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation.
View quote | Quotes about Communism and Socialism

Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won't work.
View quote | Quotes about Communism and Socialism

There should be one day when there is open season on senators.
View quote | Quotes about Congress

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
View quote | Quotes about Congress

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.
View quote | Quotes about Congress

The nation is prosperous on the whole, but how much prosperity is there in a hole?
View quote | Quotes about Debt

Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a man leaves off something he looks worse.
View quote | Quotes about Dress

An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else s.
View quote | Quotes about Economy and Economics

The Republicans have their splits right after election and Democrats have theirs just before an election.
View quote | Quotes about Elections

There isn't any finer folks living than a Republican that votes the Democratic ticket.
View quote | Quotes about Elections

There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
View quote | Quotes about Experts

Lord, let me live until I die.
View quote | Quotes about Famous Last Words

Strangers are just friends I haven't met yet.
View quote | Quotes about Friends and Friendship

Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
View quote | Quotes about Gambling

I wonder if it isn't just cowardice instead of generosity that makes us give tips.
View quote | Quotes about Giving

So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
View quote | Quotes about Gossip

The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.
View quote | Quotes about Gossip

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
View quote | Quotes about Government

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
View quote | Quotes about Government

The main thing about being a hero is to know when to die.
View quote | Quotes about Heroes and Heroism

Being a hero is about the shortest lived profession on earth.
View quote | Quotes about Heroes and Heroism

We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
View quote | Quotes about Heroes and Heroism

It's great to be great, but it's greater to be human.
View quote | Quotes about Humankind

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
View quote | Quotes about Humor

Everybody is ignorant -- only on different subjects.
View quote | Quotes about Ignorance

Things will get better -- despite our efforts to improve them.
View quote | Quotes about Improvement

People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.
View quote | Quotes about Law Suits

A man can learn only two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
View quote | Quotes about Learning

Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches.
View quote | Quotes about Liberty

In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You being there was certificate enough.
View quote | Quotes about Life and Living

It doesn't much signify whom one marries, for one is sure to find out the next morning that it was someone else.
View quote | Quotes about Marriage

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.
View quote | Quotes about Memory

You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.
View quote | Quotes about Memory

In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write, but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.
View quote | Quotes about Movies

All I know is just what I read in the papers.
View quote | Quotes about Newspapers

I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they do today.
View quote | Quotes about Nudity

Broad-minded is just another way of saying a fellow is too lazy to form an opinion.
View quote | Quotes about Opinions

A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.
View quote | Quotes about Opinions

Pain is such an uncomfortable feeling that even a tiny amount of it is enough to ruin every enjoyment.
View quote | Quotes about Pain

There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

No party is as bad as its leaders.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

Politics is not worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

The more you read and observe about this politics thing, the more you've got to admit that each party's worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

This country has gotten where it is in spite of politics, not by the aid of it. That we have carried as much political bunk as we have and still survived shows we are a super nation.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

The reason political party platforms are so long is that when you straddle anything it takes a long time to explain it.
View quote | Quotes about Politicians and Politics

I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.
View quote | Quotes about Praise

Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far.
View quote | Quotes about Praise

You can't say that civilization don't advance... for in every war they kill you a new way.
View quote | Quotes about Progress

One revolution is like one cocktail, it just gets you organized for the next.
View quote | Quotes about Revolutions and Revolutionaries

Our public men are speaking every day on something, but they ain't saying anything.
View quote | Quotes about Speakers and Speaking

If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
View quote | Quotes about Stupidity

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf.
View quote | Quotes about Taxes and Taxation

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
View quote | Quotes about Taxes and Taxation

The Income Tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
View quote | Quotes about Taxes and Taxation

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr.
View quote | Quotes about Taxes and Taxation

Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you do not know when it is through if you are a crook or a martyr.
View quote | Quotes about Taxes and Taxation

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
View quote | Quotes about Time and Time Management

If you ever injected truth into politics you would have no politics.
View quote | Quotes about Truth

Mona Lisa is the only beauty who went through history and retained her reputation.
View quote | Quotes about Virtue

The person with the best job in the country is the vice president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, How is the president?
View quote | Quotes about Work

It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
View quote | Quotes about Worth

Rogers, Will

No biography at present.

76 quotations